Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Katie Bear's Story





Katie Bear’s Story
By: Spepper69

Katie was a beautiful Black Labrador Retriever that lived a tragic and wonderful life all wrapped into one. This is her story…..

Katie was confiscated from an owner that abused her when she was about 6 months old. She was a purebred Lab. The Marin County SPCA took her after reports of severe abuse. By the time she was 6 months old; she had had a broken tail, a broken front paw, hit in the head with a hammer, yes….a hammer…..and was severely malnourished. I don’t know for sure if her former “parents,” if you can call them that, were prosecuted for her abuse or not. Her public record doesn’t say.

She was adopted by my aunt and uncle. Even with all of the abuse she had been through, she was an extremely affectionate, loving and trusting little girl. But her abuse didn’t stop with her first owners. My uncle was not a good person. And he never wanted Katie even though my aunt did. He was convinced that she had a skin condition and would bathe her every single day. And as most Lab parents know, they aren’t built for daily grooming like that. Her “skin condition” worsened. As it would with daily bathing. She had a constant rash and was itchy and she didn’t smell too good. But she took her daily baths in stride and was still the very loving little girl that she always would be. My uncle would get mad sometimes and kick her. She was very attached to my aunt and he didn’t like that.

One day my aunt called me and said that I needed to get Katie out of there before my uncle killed her. I had never met Katie before that day. While my uncle was away, I drove down to their house. I was greeted at the door by this spunky little Lab with humongous feet. I sat down, and this little girl climbed right up in my lap. I lost my heart to her that moment. As I drove home, she put her head in my lap. She laid there for the entire hour-long drive. You could almost see the relief in her eyes as she laid there on the way to her new home. No running around the car looking out the windows to see where she was…..she just completely relaxed.

First thing we did when I got her home was take her to the vet. She was still partially malnourished, but it wasn’t as bad as it was when she was 6 months old. Her growth was partially stunted from improper nutrition growing up, but overall she was in fairly good shape. As I had figured, her “skin condition” was caused by her getting bathed every day. Within one week….her skin problems completely cleared up. She got bathed once or twice a year and never had another problem with rashes or odor ever again.

For the next few years, Katie lived a wonderful carefree life. She got to sleep on the bed, got the best food, never got abused and was loved like a daughter. I called her my baby girl. And that’s exactly what she was. She loved obedience training class. She didn’t really need it, because she was well behaved. But she enjoyed going to the classes. She went through the basic class three times, just because she enjoyed it so much. She liked being the “teacher’s pet” and showing all the other doggies how it was done. Her daddy would take her out every night and work with her and she absolutely loved it.

One of the effects from being malnourished when she was younger was the development of her teeth. We noticed one day that she had a bad tooth, so off to the vet she went. Dental cleaning for dogs requires anesthesia and that requires blood tests before having surgery. That day was the start of a very long road.

Katie’s blood tests showed that she had Pancreatitis. An inflammation of the Pancreas. Another possible effect of her not getting the right foods when she was developing. They did all kinds of tests including ultrasound. We decided on treating it, not like we wouldn’t. The disease required continuous blood testing and an anti-biotic. She was a fairly large dog at almost 90 pounds. The anti-biotic was expensive. Each tablet cost $5.00 each, and she needed two to four every day. For the first few months of treatment, she had to have her blood tested at least twice a week. And you can ask me if this little girl hated going to the vet because she got stuck with a needle every single time she went there. And I can tell you honestly; no……she would march right in the back where they did the test, lay down and hold out her paw. She had this sense that she knew that what the vets were doing was helping her feel better, so she did it willingly. If she had been scared about this, I never would have put her through that. Never. But she was always so willing to have it done. I know that she knew that it was helping her.

She went through almost a year of weekly blood monitoring. After about a year, we were able to go longer between blood tests. Financially it was burying us, but we were able to refinance our house and get her medication paid for. Total costs for medicine and tests per month were over $2,000 each month. We were happy when she stabilized and didn’t have to have all the tests all the time. We still had to give her medication, but $750 a month was a lot easier to manage.

Then came the day when I set down her food dish and she wouldn’t eat. I was thinking that her disease was back in full force again. How wrong I was. I took her in to see the vet. He got down on the floor with her like he always did, and started petting her and asked her what was wrong. I saw his hands freeze on her chest. And he sat there for a moment. I then saw the tear from Dr. Thompson’s eyes.

Over the past couple of years, Dr. Corey Thompson had really bonded with Katie. He even had her picture on his desk next to his kid’s pictures. And she loved him so much. I started crying before I could even ask what was wrong. I had thought that her Pancreatitis was back and we would have to put her through all those blood tests again. He looked at me and told me that he didn’t know how to tell me this, but he was positive that Katie had cancer. Canine Lymphoma. It wasn’t the Pancreatitis at all. It was much, much worse.

Canine Lymphoma causes inflammation of the lymph nodes all over the body. I felt her chest and she had these small lumps all over her. He took a needle and did a quick biopsy of one of the lumps. There was no doubt about it, she had cancer. Being a graduate of UC Davis Veterinary Hospital, Corey got on the phone and got an appointment for her the very next day with the head of the Canine Oncology Department.

She spent all the next day at UC Davis. Having every test that could possibly be done. Ultrasound, blood tests, x-rays, everything. There was now complete confirmation of her having Lymphoma. Canine Lymphoma has two different strains. One is more treatable than the other. Katie didn’t have that one. They started her on a steroid medication and we made an appointment for the next week to start chemotherapy.

Over that week, we got as much information as we could on her cancer. I was online constantly trying to make an informed decision as to her prognosis. Most of the information I read in forums and e-mails from other parents of doggies with the disease was fairly positive. A lot of doggies went into remission with some being cancer-free for years with regular medication. We made the decision to fight the cancer.

She started chemo that week. Every single week, we would drive her up to UCD for tests and treatment. She took every treatment like a little trooper. She would get an IV in her paw and have to lie still for sometimes hours. The vet students absolutely adored her. They wouldn’t let parents into the back where they did the treatments. And from what they told me, she would lead the way. She knew her way around that place. She knew where she was supposed to go and when. She would immediately go back to her spot and lie down. The vet students would hold out their hand and she would always place her paw in their hand. She seemed to know that it was helping her.

The strange thing that happened while she was going to UCD, was that she actually seemed to be getting smarter. She started doing things around the house that she had never done before. She would take this toy heart that said “I love you” when you squeezed it and when she wanted a treat, she would go to the kitchen pantry and say “I love you.” She started to get her own leash when she wanted to go for a walk. And so many other things that she had never done before. It was as if she thought that she was a student at the university instead of being a patient. And she absolutely loved to go there, even through all the needles and tests. And even though the chemo made her not feel very good on some days.

She always appeared so happy. And I used to sit with her and ask her if she really wanted to keep going through it. She never seemed to want to give up. But I made her a promise and asked her to do the same thing. That when it was time, she would tell me. And she seemed to understand.

I remember the day that I woke up and she was lying on the bed with her Moo-cow toy. I will remember the look in her eyes that day for the rest of my life. I put my hand on her and could feel the lumps again. Katie was out of remission. I called UCD and made an appointment that morning. They confirmed what I had hoped would never come true. The chemo was no longer working and her cancer was not going to go into remission any more.

I knew that this day would come, but I never wanted it to. They didn’t know for sure how long she would have. Maybe a couple of weeks, a couple of days, but no longer than a month. On the way home on the freeway I lost it. I was by myself with her in the back seat and I couldn’t drive. I climbed into the back seat and held my little girl and cried on the side of the freeway.

When I got home, we made some plans. I wanted to make her last days with us the best they could possibly be. I had always wanted to take her to the beach. She loved the water. When she saw water, you couldn’t keep her out of it. Even when we would take her camping in the winter, there would be ice around the edges of the lake and she would still yank on her leash and try to get in. So, we rented a house for a couple of nights on the beach.

She loved the ocean. I let her swim in the Navarro River that dumped into the ocean. I wouldn’t let her swim in the surf because I knew that she wasn’t strong enough. She ran in the sand and fetched sticks in the water. She had filet mignon for every meal. And a couple of McDonald’s hamburgers, too. She was so exhausted that she slept the whole four hour drive home. But she was happy.

A few days later, it was time for bed and I called her to come upstairs. She couldn’t make it up the stairs. This was the first time in her life that she just physically couldn’t make it. At this point she weighed about 80 pounds and I picked her up and brought her to the bed. I slept with her next to me all night, kind of half sleeping making sure that she was still there.

That Saturday morning she didn’t want to get out of bed. I touched her and she didn’t feel the same. Her coat overnight changed. It didn’t feel like Katie. I kissed her on the top of her head and I noticed the strangest thing. Her scent was gone. Katie had this perfume spot on the top of her head that was so unique to her. She had the most pleasant scent in that spot of any dog I have ever known. And it was gone. She didn’t smell like my Katie Bear anymore.

I looked into her eyes and I asked her the question that I was praying that I would never have to ask her. She turned around and grabbed that stuffed toy heart and squeezed it once and said “I love you.” And I knew I had my answer.

I called Dr. Thompson and told him it was time. I made the last appointment of the day which was at 12:30. Corey had everyone at the vet office there when we arrived. The lights were dimmed and even employees that were off that day, were there. I had requested a long time before that Corey be there for her, but I couldn’t let him be the one to give her her last injection. Katie knew and loved everyone there, and Dr. Barnes had been very good to her. I trusted him to do what had to be done.

There must have been twenty people there for Katie. They all brought food for her. She had little bites of smoked salmon and steak. And even though she didn’t want to eat, she did. She took little bites from almost everybody. Going around the room to every single person and saying good-bye.

I couldn’t go in the room with her. I was trying to be strong, but I just couldn’t do it. I sat there for a few minutes and talked to her and petted her. And then she told me it was time. She put her head on my shoulder and gave me one last kiss. She turned around and all by herself she walked towards the room. When she got to the door, she turned around and looked at me, and then walked through the door. That was the last time I saw her.

Her daddy held her in his arms in the little room. And Dr. Thompson held her paw and petted her head. When it was time, she saw the needle and held out her little paw to Dr. Barnes and closed her eyes. She never opened them again.

I didn’t make it out of bed for four days. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. I had and have never grieved for someone I loved as much as I have for Katie Bear. I have lost family members including a child, and still never grieved like I have for her. And still do. Even though it was known for a long time that this disease would more than likely take her, some say we should have been prepared for it. And I originally thought that I was prepared for it. But how wrong I was.

This September of 2006 will be three years that she has been gone. And I still have yet to look at the video tape of her trip to the beach. Maybe someday I will be able to watch it. I know that some have said I was being stupid for loving a dog so much. But Katie Bear was special. I have lived 35 years and have never been without at least one dog. I don’t know if it was because of all the abuse she survived through or what it was about her that made her so special. But she was. Katie was different than other dogs. And I don’t know if I would spend all the time and money that I did for another dog. Katie had a will to survive that I have never seen in either a dog, or a person. All the crap that she had been through from the time she was a little pup to going from house to house, from disease to disease. And through all that, she shouldn’t have been such a loving, trusting, friendly little soul. But she was. She should have been timid and distant and something you wouldn’t have wanted to turn your back on. But she wasn’t.

She was almost ten years old when she lost her battle with cancer. If it wasn’t for the wonderful students and vets at UC Davis, and her personal vet Dr. Corey Thompson, she wouldn’t have lived the full life that we tried to give her. I wish she could have been here longer. I wish she was here today. But I have always felt that things happen for a reason. We may not always like that reason, but it’s a reason none-the-less. And if it wasn’t for Katie, I couldn’t have made a home for Sierra. We rescued Sierra a few months after Katie passed away. She will never be Katie, but I would never want her to be. Nothing, no one will ever replace Katie. Not in our hearts or our minds. Sierra is her own doggie, with her own personality and life. She has fit into my life, but not taken away from mommy’s little Katie Bear.

She touched so many people’s lives, in so many ways. And she will forever hold a space in my heart. She will always be missed. I will forever keep her memory alive. Dogs give us humans so much in our lives. The very least we can do for them is to keep them alive in our hearts, and in our thoughts and prayers.

Bear Bear……I will never, ever forget you……your mommy will always love you……

*****
Katie Bear sounded like such a lovely dog. I wish I could have met her.I hope you enjoyed this story. I sure did. If you have any of your own, please send them in. It might start being a weekly or monthly column.

5 comments:

  1. Anonymous7:50 PM

    TEll that woman if you could i will pray for KAtie Bear and give her traditional Jewish funerary rites. It would mean alot to me if you tell her that

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  2. Anonymous5:39 PM

    what a beautiful story for a wonderful dog. Made me cry.

    Kelly

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  3. Woah, that was a story for the ages. I'm crying. I'm speechless. Thank you, Cara...

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  4. Anonymous1:11 PM

    that was a very moving story, It reminds me of the dogs and other animals I have had in my life. the story made me cry. I know about losing a pet to cancer too. It is hard but you live each day with them and remember them when they are gone.

    D L
    Brwneyeztx@sbcglobal.net

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  5. Anonymous7:39 AM

    I am sitting here crying my eyes out after reading your story , because i am so scared that i am fixing to have to go thru the same situation as you. i have a 4 year old rottweiler/black lab mix and she has got some of those lumps on her and i've got to take her to the vet and i'm scared to death it is going to be lymphoma and i really dont know how i will be able to deal with that.. i have never loved anything or anyone as much as i do my baby girl Harley...
    thanks for the beautiful story...
    email address-> daybridgette@earthlink.net

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